Why Most Marriages Don’t Last! Part 4


God created marriage to last for a lifetime. It was designed to be the ultimate relationship for oneness between a man and a woman. Here you both can physically and spiritually become one. Strive to enhance and improve every aspect of your lives together. It is important to create a nurturing living environment. Take care to affectionately tend your marriage consistently. Keep your marriage as you would a lovely well-kept garden.  Always make your marriage a top priority.

Take care of your marriage

Take a look around your home it is a reflection of how you feel.  Now take a look at your bedroom. What does it say to you? For example; If you leave your clothes lying all over the place and hang them up whenever you want to guess what? You tend to be selfish and insensitive and don’t really care about your shared environment. You are also being inconsiderate to your spouse when this becomes a habit. Guess what? If you had guests would you treat them differently. Start being more attentive, considerate, respectful and thoughtful towards one another.


Preventative maintenance is the key to keeping order. For example. I like everything in its place. it saves times and you know where to find things. I also like organization. This works for us because we both like things organized.

You may like just letting things be. Then on the weekend or once a month you scramble to get everything in order. Or you just push everything aside and deal with it whenever you feel like it. Or do you leave it all to your spouse to do whenever. This makes for a real comfortable no hassle environment for you & yours. No big deal I will get to it when I get to it. The point is what works for your household is what is best.

As your family grows you will have to make adjustments. Once or if you have children you want to model good behavior. Color coordinating things really helps. When you have a lot of children it makes things easier. Structure helps children to feel secure. So I say; “when you play put away.” You do have to learn to be flexible and reasonable. You can also solicit a house keeper. Being to rigid is not good. It is your home and your environment so do whatever works for you and yours.

What is most important that you seek to create a balance. Your living environment should be a place you all feel comfortable.

Each marriage is different and each marriage is what you both make it. If you want to make it better and if you want to improve start improving yourself. Stop neglecting yourself and only fixing yourself up for everyone else or when you go to work, go out or attend worship. Men are visual and so are women. Change for the better not the worst! Make a covenant with your eyes and always remain faithful to your spouse. Keep healthy boundaries and stay committed to honor your marriage. Do you take care of yourself like you did when you were dating? We are older now; NO! Still no excuse. Age like a fine antique. Or do you just throw yourself together now because after all you are married to him or her so what? You should take care of your self to the degree you did when you came together or better. Strive to become the “BEST YOU” at any age.

Marriage can be a wonderful experience of growing with the one you love it truly can last for a lifetime. Keep an exciting synergy between you. Being happy is a choice! When you truly invest yourself in your marriage it will always remain a priority. You can always look forward to going home.

Keeping GOD as the CENTER of your marriage is important. PRAY, read and study the WORD together. This will really enhance your marriage and your life. After all you did make a vow to HIM as well. Life is precious. Make it a point to get better not bitter. You truly can continually refine your relationship. You really can have a beautiful realistic marriage. You, your spouse, your children and everyone else benefits. You actually give others HOPE!

True Love lasts through forever

Make it a point to keep your marriage and your spouse happiness a priority. You can still enjoy the company of friends and loved ones. But don’t let everyone else but your spouse know what is going on with you and how you are feeling about you or them! Share with one another intimately. Have some fun activities together. Allow one another their space and freedom to breath. Don’t suffocate one another. When you don’t you will actually enjoy one another whenever you are together. Plan to have a marriage date weekly. Keep your marriage exciting. Again, I cannot say this enough; Keep one another and your marriage a priority.

Continually Invite love into your marriage and actually love on one another.

True Love lasts through forever. Be kindly affectionate towards one another. Unexpected hugs go a long way. Every touch does not have to lead to intercourse. Kiss one another whenever you are parting. Encourage one another. Take time to let one another in on what is going on in your life. How you feel, how you hurt and how you together want to keep love alive. Major in the Victories of life and minor in the disappointments. Life is Precious! CELEBRATE your marriage often. Be friends, lovers and partners. You both should desire what is best for one another. In a good healthy marriage you want one another to be the “Best You” you can be with one another by your side. You increasingly become One! This is true when GOD IS in the center of your marriage. You want and desire your marriage to last “until death do part.” Your vows remain important.

Happiness is a conscious choice. Commitment & fidelity is a choice. You can’t make them happy. However, you surely can greatly contribute to them becoming happier. Creating an intimate, loving, caring, warm, transparent, stable, secure and mutually inviting environment together helps tremendously. Here both of you can continue to grow and flourish together and make a beautiful fragrant bouquet that says “I LOVE YOU!” Now and through FOREVER!

ENJOY one another and KEEP Your “I DO” real! True LOVE lasts through ETERNITY!

Why most marriages don’t last! Part 3

February 11, 2016 by  
Filed under Marriage & Relationships

Why most marriages don’t last?

What Is Love ?

Part 3

You can build a strong loving marriage. Working together is key to your happiness. You both have the power to make a fulfilling union. Compassion will help you mutually bond immensely. For your marriage to last it must remain a top priority to both of you.

You are considering getting married? Wow how exciting! You want to make sure you start by building a strong solid foundation. Love, trust, respect and loyalty are a must. They will solidify your union. Your marriage will be what you both make it. It is important to know; many marriages in this 21st century don’t last.

A few things to think about.

Please don’t go into the marriage thinking that you will be able to change each other. There are many resources available when planning your big day. But few think about resources to maintain and build your marriage. For those of you who have never been married before, you must allow for a period of adjustment once married. Living with someone is not the same as dating or being married. The difference is you have not really made a total commitment to one another. You both realize that you can simply opt out at any time…


Commit to always treat one another with respect. After the honeymoon period is over remain patient.  Whenever you hit a kink see this as an opportunity to take your marriage to a deeper level. Don’t allow issues that crop up to fester and become sour. Think before you fly of the handle and say something you will regret. It is during this time you need to work together rather than pull farther apart. Don’t take one another for granted. Make it a point to keep you marriage exciting.

A great marriage takes two committed spouses

If you have not married; please do not manipulate your potential spouse into a relationship. If you do it will be an ongoing dynamic in your relationship. You should genuinely care for this person and desire to grow together. You want to encourage transparency in order to build a strong secure marriage. Before marrying really have some candid and open discussion as to how you would like things to be in order to see if you are on the same page! Don’t just assume?


It is a good to take time and find out more about what each other likes and dislikes. Are you a morning person? Do you sleep with socks on? Do you snore? Are you patient? Do you yell scream and cuss to get your way? Do you rant and rave or manipulate? Or do you sulk and stay quiet, remote cold and unexpressive? Do you think that you should have everything that you want when you want it? Do you want your spouse to do everything for you and be waited on hand and foot and you do very little in return yourself? Or do you like to talk things through… Are you patient kind and loving. If you are you will be able to keep a balance. Or do you quit when the going gets tough?


It is the seemingly little things that add up and lead to arguments. It is easier for some to say how they feel when they are angry. Learn to be open and honestly discuss how you are feeling. Don’t make sorry a sorry word. Chill out and warm up to one another. It really is better to say “I am hurting.” Don’t let pride and insecurity dominate your marriage. How else will you settle your disputes if you do not take the time to responsibly communicate with each other? Wait until you have cooled off or can talk without being hostile. Please do not think that by not talking about issues they will go away; they won’t!

A great marriage will last for a lifetime

Now that we have discussed some of the not so good things we can move towards what it takes to build a better marriage. You sit down at work and discuss whatever the problem is, right! Why? Because work is a priority and you do not just opt out of your job when things are not going your way. Or if you attend worship you volunteer to do whatever. But when you are at home you are cantankerous? If so this is not good. It is important that you like and respect one another in marriage even more so. Why? Because you say you love this person!

You love them enough to get to know them better. You like them enough to care about their well-being. You care enough to develop loyalty in your marriage. Make sure to have a weekly marriage date. This does not mean you have to always go somewhere. It could just be a quiet relaxed evening committed to spending quality time together. Spend time in the Word together it is a wonderful time to bond. Remember keep your marriage exciting. Life is precious and each day is a gift from the Lord. It is important not to lose sight of this or you will just take one another for granted and improving the marriage will no longer be a one of your top priorities.

Make your marriage a priority

Life is about priorities. Take time out to tend to the people and things that are important to you. This is called being responsible. Marriage is the ultimate relationship between a man and a woman. If your marriage is going to last you have to make a conscious effort to work at it.  Keep the embers of love burning to keep it exciting.  Do interesting and adventurous things together!


You want to build a mutually satisfying sexual relationship between you as well. Coming together physically as one should be a special time. This is a time of sharing and caring.  A time to experience a time of euphoria together. Marriage is when two can be totally physically one with God’s Blessings. Pray and ask the Lord to help you make this a special time of nurturing, care, love and fulfillment together. It is also a time to be “fruitful and multiply” which is another Blessing from the Lord. You can experience unity when you freely give of yourselves to one another.   Create  a loving environment.  You keep the embers burning by being affectionate and caring towards one another.


Each couple is different so together build what works for you. It is okay to have your physical needs met so there’s no reason to be ashamed.  When you have not had sexual relations before, it takes a while to feel relaxed, and become free. It can be quite odd not really knowing what to expect or how to respond. This is natural so be patient with one another. You will have to release some of the things you have heard or thought. Share how you are feeling with you spouse. It will eventually work out. Take time to focus on fulfilling one another’s physical needs. Each couple is different. How often or few or when is between the two of you. The marriage bed is honorable in the eyes of the Lord.

See Part 4

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