Learning The Art of “Being Still” Part 3

God wants us to learn the art of “Being Still”dreamstimefree_3428891[1]God is absolutely awesome!  He wants all of us to  receive the precious gift of His Holy Spirit,  who is His Comforter.   Once we accept Jesus Christ into our hearts, His Holy Spirit internally resides within us.  His now abiding Holy Spirit  becomes  our Spiritual Teacher. God is a Spirit of Truth. It is our daily choice to observe, learn, listen and take heed.

Know the benefits of the Blood of Jesus

“How much more, then, will the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offer Himself unblemished to GOD, cleanse our consciences from acts that lead to death, so that we may serve the LIVING GOD! For this reason Christ is the mediator of a New Covenant, that those who are called may receive the promised eternal inheritance-now that He has died as a ransom to set them free from…” HEBREWS 9

 

 

There is so much more I cannot tell it all. So  You must begin to diligently seek the Lord for yourself. Spend time daily in His Word.   Taste and see  in His Word for yourself that the Lord is GOOD!   Did you know there truly is cleansing power in “The Blood?”   Take some time and learn to “BE STILL”.

 

Life is quite interesting. It really can make one ask  at times, “How did we get here?”  To know   one must believe His Word.  You see it is not,  nor has it ever been popular to really “Believe” in God.   The idea is still quite abstract to many.   There are consequences for living as a true believer.  Your spiritual eyes must be open to discern the spiritual warfare that is about you.  His  disciples were, misunderstood, rejected, abandoned,  and  treated horrendously on many occasions.   We as believers are really supposed to be  faithful modern-day disciples.

 

The masses have always ignored what God has to say,  from Genesis to Revelation.  The scriptures record over and over that man did what was right in his own eyes.”  Or simply went along with whatever was trendy or popular.   When you decide to “stand up” for what is right  many  will sit on the fence……..  It was one of Jesus disciples that betrayed Him.  Have you ever thought about where were all those people Jesus helped, and healed when they crucified Him? Look all around, we are in a crisis.  Look at the scandalous political race for the President of the United States.  The news, the economy, immorality,  the world  at large in which we live has reached  catastrophic   proportions on many levels.   Crisis always brings about a change.   “The earth is the Lord’s and the fullness thereof the world and them that dwell therein…” Yet in the midst of it all God has a way of getting our attention and showing us ALL He can use who and whomever He pleases to bring about “CHANGE!”

 

 

Throughout His Word you will find spiritual warfare involving, nations, countries, families, relationships,  personality conflicts, false teachers, misunderstandings, manipulation, sexual sins, slander, you name it and it’s there. If you are looking for a case history to profile  or  evaluate it’s there.  God did a  marvelous thing when He allowed man to record His Story. His splendid, spectacular, awe-inspiring Word is the Greatest Story ever recorded.  God’s Word is priceless!  He has also given us the Promise that “He would never leave nor forsake us.”   We can always & forever TRUST GOD!!!

 “…Thine is the KINGDOM & The GLORY!”  For LORD YOU are “GLORIOUS!  For YOUR KINGDOM will reign FOREVER!

In life, God genuinely makes all the difference in the world!  Getting to know God helps you  to incredibly  cope with what has gone on, is going on and is to come. It is in HIM that one can rest and find comfort and “BE STILL” even within the most difficult situations.  But I must warn  you it is not always an easy thing to do.  Stay alert!  God is near.

Wherever you are or whatever your situation good or bad know it can change at anytime.  We are living in some very interesting times.  Year in and year out, know that  “Jesus is the reason for the season” whether you are a believer or not!  Know that wherever you are Jesus knows.  You can call on Him 24/7 anytime, anywhere and in every situation.

When you accept Him as your Savior, Lord and Shepherd, He will and can take you through this valley of the shadow of death.  Whenever  necessary He will lead you to the still  peaceful waters.  This is a special place of contentment in His presence.  God wants  to lead us on the righteous path that leads to eternal life with Him.    He gives us the freedom to choose. The peace of God does surpass the understanding of man. Know  some  things will not be understood on this side of Heaven. But always keep in mind absolutely nothing that comes your way gets by Him.  “It is in Him we move and live and have our being.”  God is always speaking we just have to get better at listening. This is why discipline  becomes so very important.

Be encouraged!  We can “do all things through  Christ  that strengthens me.”   But first we must trust Him and surrender our will to Him. Oh taste and see  that the Lord is good.   Today begin your life  to live each day to please the Lord.   His TRUTH is everlasting  throughout all generations and yes; “BE STILL” and know that He is the Great “I AM” who always was, has been and always will be.  He is worthy of  all the praise.  Everyday; “To GOD be the Glory!”

Why most marriages don’t last! Part 3

February 11, 2016 by  
Filed under Marriage & Relationships

Why most marriages don’t last?

What Is Love ?

Part 3

You can build a strong loving marriage. Working together is key to your happiness. You both have the power to make a fulfilling union. Compassion will help you mutually bond immensely. For your marriage to last it must remain a top priority to both of you.

You are considering getting married? Wow how exciting! You want to make sure you start by building a strong solid foundation. Love, trust, respect and loyalty are a must. They will solidify your union. Your marriage will be what you both make it. It is important to know; many marriages in this 21st century don’t last.

A few things to think about.

Please don’t go into the marriage thinking that you will be able to change each other. There are many resources available when planning your big day. But few think about resources to maintain and build your marriage. For those of you who have never been married before, you must allow for a period of adjustment once married. Living with someone is not the same as dating or being married. The difference is you have not really made a total commitment to one another. You both realize that you can simply opt out at any time…

 

Commit to always treat one another with respect. After the honeymoon period is over remain patient.  Whenever you hit a kink see this as an opportunity to take your marriage to a deeper level. Don’t allow issues that crop up to fester and become sour. Think before you fly of the handle and say something you will regret. It is during this time you need to work together rather than pull farther apart. Don’t take one another for granted. Make it a point to keep you marriage exciting.

A great marriage takes two committed spouses
 

If you have not married; please do not manipulate your potential spouse into a relationship. If you do it will be an ongoing dynamic in your relationship. You should genuinely care for this person and desire to grow together. You want to encourage transparency in order to build a strong secure marriage. Before marrying really have some candid and open discussion as to how you would like things to be in order to see if you are on the same page! Don’t just assume?

 

It is a good to take time and find out more about what each other likes and dislikes. Are you a morning person? Do you sleep with socks on? Do you snore? Are you patient? Do you yell scream and cuss to get your way? Do you rant and rave or manipulate? Or do you sulk and stay quiet, remote cold and unexpressive? Do you think that you should have everything that you want when you want it? Do you want your spouse to do everything for you and be waited on hand and foot and you do very little in return yourself? Or do you like to talk things through… Are you patient kind and loving. If you are you will be able to keep a balance. Or do you quit when the going gets tough?

 

It is the seemingly little things that add up and lead to arguments. It is easier for some to say how they feel when they are angry. Learn to be open and honestly discuss how you are feeling. Don’t make sorry a sorry word. Chill out and warm up to one another. It really is better to say “I am hurting.” Don’t let pride and insecurity dominate your marriage. How else will you settle your disputes if you do not take the time to responsibly communicate with each other? Wait until you have cooled off or can talk without being hostile. Please do not think that by not talking about issues they will go away; they won’t!

A great marriage will last for a lifetime
 

Now that we have discussed some of the not so good things we can move towards what it takes to build a better marriage. You sit down at work and discuss whatever the problem is, right! Why? Because work is a priority and you do not just opt out of your job when things are not going your way. Or if you attend worship you volunteer to do whatever. But when you are at home you are cantankerous? If so this is not good. It is important that you like and respect one another in marriage even more so. Why? Because you say you love this person!

You love them enough to get to know them better. You like them enough to care about their well-being. You care enough to develop loyalty in your marriage. Make sure to have a weekly marriage date. This does not mean you have to always go somewhere. It could just be a quiet relaxed evening committed to spending quality time together. Spend time in the Word together it is a wonderful time to bond. Remember keep your marriage exciting. Life is precious and each day is a gift from the Lord. It is important not to lose sight of this or you will just take one another for granted and improving the marriage will no longer be a one of your top priorities.

Make your marriage a priority
 

Life is about priorities. Take time out to tend to the people and things that are important to you. This is called being responsible. Marriage is the ultimate relationship between a man and a woman. If your marriage is going to last you have to make a conscious effort to work at it.  Keep the embers of love burning to keep it exciting.  Do interesting and adventurous things together!

 

You want to build a mutually satisfying sexual relationship between you as well. Coming together physically as one should be a special time. This is a time of sharing and caring.  A time to experience a time of euphoria together. Marriage is when two can be totally physically one with God’s Blessings. Pray and ask the Lord to help you make this a special time of nurturing, care, love and fulfillment together. It is also a time to be “fruitful and multiply” which is another Blessing from the Lord. You can experience unity when you freely give of yourselves to one another.   Create  a loving environment.  You keep the embers burning by being affectionate and caring towards one another.

 

Each couple is different so together build what works for you. It is okay to have your physical needs met so there’s no reason to be ashamed.  When you have not had sexual relations before, it takes a while to feel relaxed, and become free. It can be quite odd not really knowing what to expect or how to respond. This is natural so be patient with one another. You will have to release some of the things you have heard or thought. Share how you are feeling with you spouse. It will eventually work out. Take time to focus on fulfilling one another’s physical needs. Each couple is different. How often or few or when is between the two of you. The marriage bed is honorable in the eyes of the Lord.

See Part 4

Marriage and Addiction Relief Part 1

Marriage and addiction

Monkeys

Part 1

Addiction is something few want to readily discuss. There is reason for alarm when an addiction is apparent. It needs to be addressed. It will at some point impede upon your relationship. Transparency is necessary in order to build intimacy. Addiction will inhibit intimacy within the marriage. Addiction also prohibits you from being transparent. Love, transparency, trust and intimacy are essential components in building a healthy satisfying marriage.

Addiction is a clear indicator that you are hurting. You have simply found an unhealthy way to cope with your deep pain. Your addiction can be alcohol, cocaine, heroin, marijuana, uppers, downers, prescription drugs, gambling, caffeine, illicit sex, people, pornography, food and even shopping! Yes and there are more… Even approval from others. Guess what? You have only found a way to momentarily relieve or somewhat ease your infuriating inner pain; it is still there. The addiction is a flag that something is wrong. You need to seek a healthy resolve.

I say momentarily because while under the influence or indulging in the activity of choice you are able to somewhat escape. However the systemic cause remains because the pain returns whenever you are alone. Often more vehement than ever before. This causes you to each time pursue passionately that which you are addicted to. Addiction of any kind can be life threatening because you are out of control. Your desires consume you and disables your ability to be responsible or demonstrate genuine love. Instead the activity controls you and you will do whatever it takes to get a “quick fix!

How does this impact my marriage? Good question. Marriage is a partnership and when one has an addiction they are not able to fully commit because the addiction is often their main priority. The spouse that is unaware is kept in the dark. Secrets, lies and deception accompany addiction. The addiction is used to fill the insatiable void in the addicted partner’s heart. It instead becomes their companion. This leaves their spouse out in the cold.

A disordered family, peer pressure, cultural influences, abuse, incest, rape, molestation, lack of self-esteem and a weakness to experiment can all contribute to one developing an addiction.

We live in a drug friendly worldly environment. Daily we are bombarded with the invitation to take this pill or that pill. Notice how many television commercials attempt to sell you something to feel better! Notice how the dinner hour has become the prime time for commercial pushers. There are a multiplicity of pushers of all sort. Doctors also oblige patients with tranquilizers, stimulants, pain pills, sleeping pills even pills to wake you up!

Keeping your commitments are important. One thing that needs to be promoted more is a personal relationship with the Lord! Marriage is ordained by God. It was designed to be the ultimate sacred relationship between a man and a woman. It can also help you prioritize life and put all your other relationships into their proper perspective, it can help you develop a healthier living environment.

Building trust is an important part of marriage. As we commit to building healthier home environments we contribute to lessening the number of addictions continuing to escalate. A safe home environment does not exclude addiction; but it does serve to nurture those who are… The possibility to break the generational cycle of dysfunction becomes attainable.

It is important to seek ways to validate one another. To develop and ongoing healthy support system that says I love and sincerely care. This does not mean you support the addiction. No! You separate the behavior from the person. You encourage them to be the best they can be and find ways to help them become who they were created to be.

God created each of us uniquely and we have varying temperaments. Our needs are different when these needs are not met a void is created and therefore one seeks to often erroneously fill that void. Marriage is about working together to find healthier ways to fill some of those voids with a committed partner… There are some voids that can only be filled by God.

Your partner is not responsible for your addiction you are. Both must hold one another accountable for their actions! You both are accountable to God for the vows you made… Remember, “for better or for worse…”

In this 21st century emotional gasoline has flamed the fires of addiction. Pain, grief and stress not dealt with properly are great contributors that drive unhealthy desires. This does not have to be. God’s Holy Spirit His Comforter is more than able.

Addiction is big business therefore it is often rationalized and one can easily find access and support. Addiction does not usually happen overnight it is a gradual process that begins with a series of steps…

Next we will discuss some of those steps;

Part 2

Learning The Art Of “Being Still” Part 1

dreamstimefree_1144122[1]Whenever you are amidst spiritual warfare or when a crisis arises, it is important that  you  seek and learn to “BE STILL.” Being still does not mean that you are unconcerned or oblivious to what is happening. You  are not  simply just doing nothing.  Nor is it a delusional state of  unconsciousness  rendering being in denial.  You are not having   erroneous illusions of  grandeur. You are not being self-centered.  Quite the contrary.  You are God centered!  Your spiritual awareness is  actually  heightened.  It is a non combative state.

 

During spiritual warfare or a crisis, usually there is much stress.  People often respond in ways that are counterproductive.  One will tend to make hasty decisions and  become easily angered.  Over indulgence in drugs, alcohol, or  some other substance  or unfavorable activity is not advised.  You may even become passive since there is a  lack of  coping skills.  Instead it really is very important  to be responsible.  Instead strive  to  be  more attentive. Be alert  to your surroundings as well as  those about you.  Learn to become flexible and resilient,   so you will not get towed along.  Being still is a state of mind that helps you remain focused. Staying in a cognizant preferred  chosen calm state of  tranquility.  Not walking  in  weakness,  but  making a sincere attempt to submit to a disciplined practice of walking  in “meekness.”   Here your faith and trust is rooted and grounded in the Lord.

 

You seek to be led by the Spirit!

 

 

It helps sometimes to also keep a  sense  of  humor about it all.  Just know, a bit of  appropriate  laughter is a good antidote for the soul.  Laughter helps to keep things within a healthy responsive balance.  Readily enlist earnestly the opportunity to “pray unceasingly.”  To be aware that the often orchestrated  situation at hand, really wants you to “act out”  or respond in an unseemly, improper or inappropriate  carnal manner.  Which  really only  wants to cast you in an unfavorable light to simply mar your testimony.

 

Take a few moments of  personal Worship and Praise!

 

 

Having the Lord within your life truly does make all the difference in the world!   It is  quite splendid! As we grow in His grace we learn to respond or not respond by embracing the Fruit of His Spirit! You care more,  but react less impulsively. Your desire is to please Him as well as your commitment to Him increases as well. You learn to incorporate “Praying without ceasing” into all areas of your life.  This conscious state of being  keeps you connected to the Lord. You choose to focus on the Lord rather than get pulled away from your center.

 

Know that there is always  spiritual warfare all about us even in the midst of corporate worship!

 

One must learn to depend and call upon the Lord wherever we may be. This is often in an inaudible way, momentarily and meekly  inwardly bowing, knowing that your heart becomes an immediate altar.  Since we cannot avoid crisis learn to invite God into the messiness about you. It is possible as the Word says; to be angry and sin not.”  Trusting and knowing that God knows your heart and  always hears your cries. Remember Psalm 27; “The Lord is my Light  and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid…”  In His time He can and will deliver you from any and all evil!  Ephesians clearly tells us to  “Finally be strong in  the Lord and in His mighty power.  Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes.  For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.  Therefore put on your spiritual armor of God so when the evil day comes, you may be able to stand your ground…….” Ephesians 6

 

The Greek word for crisis is krinein, which means “to decide.”   Crisis and spiritual warfare can come at unexpected moments. Usually the decisions that you have to make are life changing.  decide  to  take some time and “BE STILL.”  Know that God is always near.   See this as an opportunity to put in  practice what it means to exercise “patience.”   His  Blessed Assurance can truly be experienced, once born of  His Spirit! Always  keeping  in mind that God knows and has everything  under His complete control  really helps.

 

Once you become a child of God   it is important to get to know Him. Draw close to Him.   Your ongoing  up close,  personal and intimate relationship with the Lord is more important than anything or anyone!  Absolutely nothing  can take God’s place in your life     He has embedded deep within  each of us a place that only He can fill. One must  avidly  commence to daily   seek to grow in the grace and  knowledge  of  our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!  Without Him we are merely  walking breathing shaped dust.

 

God has a plan and purpose for each of our lives. We are  to read, ponder, digest,  and dwell upon His Word and implement the principles therein.  Our  desire  should be to respond in a way that pleases Him. To know the difference between the  “works of the flesh”  and the “Fruit of His Spirit” that is discussed in Galatians 5.   We need not make excuses for sin but readily repent.  Sin separates us from the Lord. His Word truly is meant to be our Life  Manual!  It is essentially, imperative to keep in mind that the people, situations and scenarios presented really did happen.  He has given us fabulous examples.  There is a plethora of wisdom in the Scriptures.  So much so to a degree, that it can boggle your mind.  This is why it is important that we ask for His promised Comforter  to fill us, to illuminate our understanding while journeying through its tasty, appetizing, palatable pages.

 

See Part 2

 

 

 

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