Getting Your Joy Back Part 4

HALLLELLLUJAH THANK YOU JESUS!!!

You can call upon Jesus 24/7. So if you are going through; You have to learn how to TRUST GOD! Life may try to take everything that you have, but TRUST GOD! It may try to take your health or take the health of your love ones, But TRUST GOD! It  may attempt to divide your home, your marriage and your family and  to uproot your children, But TRUST GOD! The enemy  may even try to take your life, But TRUST GOD! Always remember who you are in the Lord! Praise and thank GOD for a; “Solid Rock Foundation!”

The prince of the power of  the air can not do anymore than God allows. We are living in the midst of an Invisible Spiritual Warzone. Therefore, daily keep your focus upon God! Know this; when you are God’s child know that when its all said and done in the end WE WIN! God did not say it will all be good. But He did say; “ALL things will work together for the GOOD when you LOVE HIM and are called according to HIS purpose.” So come what may;  PRAISE GOD & SAY HALLLELLLUJAH ANYHOW!

Spiritual warfare is all around us

Think about this the enemy wants to steal your JOY! He will use any and everything or anyone who is willing to attempt to do just that. He wants to pull you down emotionally, physically and to lower your standard of living by tempting you to compromise your principles. Praise be to God, for He has given us His Holy Spirit, His Comforter. Our God given principles are some of your most invaluable possessions. They are bestowed to help discipline and empower you. Each day is an opportunity to grow in the grace and knowledge of God. Through our faith and trust in the Lord we gain access. We never become the power but realize that; “Greater is He that is within us than he that is in the world. “

While going through you must open your spiritual eyes and ears. Quite often some of those you have helped will often get selective amnesia. I often wondered where were all those people that Jesus helped when they crucified Him. God always knows. We can always depend on God and His Word. There truly is much spiritual warfare about us. Our world and our country is in trouble. This world is on a “slippery slope!” But our weapons are not carnal. Stay prepared and be alert. Is your armor together? Our true help is only in the Lord.

The Peace of God can sustain you


Know God intimately! Pray daily for His Precious Holy Spirit to fill you with His presence. Then whatever comes your way as it gets too heavy give it to the Lord. Do all you can do, as you give it to Him and then simply STAND! TRUST GOD! Regardless of what happens the enemy can’t take your JOY unless you let him. He will try so do not give it to him.

Allow the peace of God to sustain you. When you know God intimately His Word becomes woven and deeply embedded into the fabric of who you are. “Your WORD have I hidden in my heart so I may not sin against YOU.” Trust His Holy Spirit who will bring it to your remembrance. He will also bring comfort for He is God’s Comforter.

If you have let the shade be pulled down over your life and the enemy has inserted, regrets, depression, anxiety, stress, eating disorders, compulsive behaviors, addictions, disease, manipulation, and anything else in as your daily companions know that they are not of God. Begin to let it or them go! Reach to the Lord. You do not have to live with regrets. Things can always get better… Call upon Him who is always near. When needed or necessary You can also pray with someone who is on one accord. You have the authority within you through Christ Jesus so use it and shift your focus to the Lord. You will be strengthened as you discipline yourself to praise and daily thank God!

Practice makes Permanent!

God is the Ultimate Father, readily accessible to ALL who call upon Him sincerely and believe and accept His Son Jesus Christ into their heart as their Lord and Savior. Continue or begin implementing His principles within your daily life. Practice makes permanent! His gift to you is His Precious Holy Spirit that nurtures us and is His GIFT that assures us of Eternal life with Him! No one or nobody can change that.

God teaches us the importance of faithfulness and loyalty! It is paramount to always take your commitment to the Lord seriously. There is nothing more important in life. “Whatever you do, do it as unto the Lord.” You can call upon Jesus 24/7!

Don’t try to be like someone else. Be the best you, you can be! Be the Designer’s Original. Everywhere you are God is. So if you have let your JOY go because…. Take it back. “Though you have not seen Him, you LOVE Him; and even though you do not see Him now, you believe in Him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious JOY, for you are receiving the goal of your FAITH, the SALVATION of your souls.” I PETER

God is Omnipresent

You can always and forever count on God knowing He is everywhere you are. The question is do you invite His presence? Did you know that it really is true; “ …For in Him we live and move and have our being.” Acts 17. To better understand this it is important to daily  begin building your very own ongoing personal relationship with Him.

Just think when something happens; don’t you prefer to talk to someone you know? Always remember; You can call upon Jesus 24/7! So don’t just wait until something happens. God is not far away. He in fact is so close that you do not even have to say a Word for Him to hear you. He even knows your every thought! Our little finite minds cannot really conceive of GOD and all His fullness. “Without faith it is impossible to please God.” But through FAITH we can develop an ever growing TRUST in HIM.

See Part 5

Welcome Love in Marriage Part 2

March 11, 2016 by  
Filed under Archives

Rose Blooming
Welcome Love!

Part 2

Love is an important element of a great marriage. Marriage is the ultimate covenant relationship for a couple to learn how to grow together! It is a sacred union between a husband and wife! You both come together to build a lasting committed bond! When you both are dedicated to the Lord know that there will be a continuing barrage of spiritual warfare launched against your marriage! It often comes from the least expected places… It wants to undermine your credibility, destroy trust, infringe on your union and is designed to get you to respond in a carnal mode that will only divide you.

 

 

Disagreeing is a part of any strong marriage! You both are different and do not always see eye to eye.  Why is it when you disagree you somehow forget what your spouse means to you! Or somehow you manage to push it in the background! Instead you often pull out the emotional boxing gloves and erect a mental boxing ring and come out punching! Often piercing the heart with deadly emotional punches that crush the soul! Or either you flip the script and make it about you! Bear in mind that there is always exceptions! This is not to point the finger but to put a halt to the staggering overabundance of marriages ending in divorce! To instead encourage you to “welcome love!”

 

 

There are those who use the word “Love!” so very loosely! They see love as something that makes them feel good! They feel you love them because you tell them what they want to hear and give them what they want when they want it… This is really not love at all! What you are really dealing with is the neglected “child” in them that has not grown up and always wants its way! They often hold on to “Me ness” instead of embracing “We ness” It becomes clear when you do not agree or tell them “No!”

 

 

Please don’t feed this monstrous bad habit! I say habit because it is a pattern that can be changed…! “Practice makes permanent! If not it will eventually manipulate you and everyone around them to appease their seemingly endless need to be cared for! Unresolved emotional issues have all too often become the scapegoat to fuel and appease their desires! On the surface it merely and at times cleverly mimics love in order to have its way! What often happens with someone of this nature; instead of growing beyond their childhood trauma it becomes a blanket excuse for any inappropriate behavior that may be confronted! It will drain you, your emotions, your resources as well as your finances! It is important to have compassion… To avidly seek to understand the deeper need! However, good boundaries are necessary and you must learn how to “guard your heart!”

 

Love is talked about but impatience, anger, insecurity, irresponsibility and immediate self-gratification are usually the behavior most often displayed… This does not have to be.

 

They simply justify having whatever it is they want! When you do not comply they feel rejected! They themselves are emotionally starved because they have never really truly experienced true love! They really do not know what love is really all about! Many in our society today confuse love with “lust” or what I call “intoxicating affections” that last for only a season! This is also the reason for a lot of divorces! It is important to begin to address any unresolved issues… In a warm loving, caring environment trust and security can flourish! One can grow beyond their issues!

 

 

True love is not selfish! It fills the void properly when sincerely embraced! Love is a part of the Fruit of the Spirit! “God is love!” He is eternal and so is His love! Enlist the principles of true love described in I Corinthians 13! They work! Use this as an effective barometer to measure love over lust, and or intoxicating affections! “Love is patient, love is kind, It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in Truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves. Love never fails…”

 

If many truly learn how to love each other there would be a lot less marriages dissolving.   Less families being divided and fewer divorces! We would instead see a lot more long term marriages continue to flourish! God never intended for your marriage to grow stale!

 

 

Begin to embrace redemptive confrontation and meet head-on in love! Just because it is your spouse you do not have to become “raw…” After so many unkind insults are continually inflicted upon one another it leaves debilitating emotional scars. This means together making a conscientious effort learning to face and embrace constructively resolving any conflict! Learn not to or stop taking one another for granted! This can deplete your marriage of comfort and security! Respect should be intricately woven into your marriage! Your feelings matter…Together you learn to deal with difficult situations as they arise! It is not wise to avoid confrontation, because this can build resentment… Addressing the issues at hand is important as well as healthy! If left undone, quite often the next step is; I’m out of here! On to the next person!

See part 3

Why most marriages don’t last! Part 2

February 11, 2016 by  
Filed under Marriage & Relationships

picture of pit
Why Most Marriages Don’t Last!

Part 2

There has been a shift in the atmosphere!

Many marriages in this 21st century are in crisis. On the News, on the internet and all across the United States of America you see couples in distress. Marriages within the church, in your neighborhood and those on your jobs are also struggling. You can find many unique interesting stories about couples that can’t seem to work through their issues. What you read, see and hear are indicative of what is happening everywhere all over the globe!

This does not have to be.

A great marriage really is definitely possible. Marriage requires love, commitment, patience and lots of teamwork! Counseling is an alternative that helps and it can enhance your marriage. But your goal must be to work through the kinks in the marriage rather than let them persist. If you wait until your problems are seemingly insurmountable it will take some time to plow through your relationship dynamics. It is also and indication that you two have gotten slack. You have allowed your marriage to become secondary.

Yes, many couples all over the world are going through. But don’t be discouraged. Help is on the way! This does not have to be. You both need to get busy shifting your priorities. Time to look at some viable options.

Hmm perhaps counseling?

There are times when counseling is sought just as a last resort. You simply attempt to appease one another and are trying to buy some time… When this is the case; by the time the couple goes to counseling the problem is so bad that they just want to find out which spouse is responsible for their marriage problems? They are often just seeking support and approval to justify why they act or behave in the manner in which they do? The fact of the matter is your communication skills are lacking to the point you have lost some of your objectivity.

You now need or desire a neutral third-party to help you see if you can revive the marriage and get it back on track?

How can we get back on track?

The Truth of the matter is each spouse is not always equally responsible for each problem. Quite often a lot of old baggage has not been addressed and it becomes a recurring theme. Instead of getting discouraged get actively busy resolving your issues and the issues at hand. This is really a great time to further develop your communication skills.

Let’s see what God has to say!

You can and should also incorporate the Bible as wise counsel in your marriage. Not in a rigid legalistic manner but in a way to enhance your marriage. It is important that you marry someone who values the same life principles! However if this is not the case you can still consult the Lord’s Word. There is some superb, really great “stuff” in the Bible that many are not aware of. I mean this in a complimentary way. Try doing a word search on Marriage and see where it takes you. There are some great love stories as well as excellent examples of tests and trials. The Lord never intended for any of us to be unhappy and disappointed all the time… I suggest that you also go to Galatians 5 and learn the differences between the works of the flesh and the Fruit of His Spirit!

Remember those vows you made to God and your spouse! Well the Bible has a wealth of wisdom to help you in any and every situation. The Bible is like no other book. It is alive! Pray for direction from the Lord. Ask Him to speak to your heart.

Please, don’t just read the Bible you must actually implement the principles into your own personal life and marriage. It is not wise to use the Word to manipulate or hurl insults upon your spouse. After all the Lord KNOWS what He is talking about.

If you have a friend that is having marital conflict encourage them to seek helpful ways to resolve it. It is important to respect your marriage as well as the marriage of others. When asked for advice make it a point to be objective. Don’t experiment on their marriage and suggest things that are harmful rather than constructive. If you don’t know, tell them you don’t know. Help them look at the situation from all angles. Sometimes a listening ear is all that is necessary to sort through the problem. Never support abuse on any level in or from anyone… Learn to be a better friend by encouraging them to do what is right.

What is so interesting is that as adults you can do as you please. That is, unless you simply have no self-control yourself and are rather compulsive. In that case you just cannot restrain or discipline yourself and you freak out at the slightest little thing. The problem won’t just go away on its own… If this is the case you really need to put yourself in check and seek out getting some professional help! By the way prayer really does work!

Please if you know that your spouse has a short fuse don’t try to purposefully set them off. This does not mean that you are to be a doormat. Choose your battles wisely don’t encourage abuse or dysfunction in yourself or anyone else. Don’t be or become an enabler.

So why can’t you make a decision to work out your problems? It’s because you have opted to go the way of the majority or just “do your own thing!” You can simply do what makes you feel good instead at the expense of your spouse? Live together and really be miles apart. But is it really good for you or your marriage? No! That’s called being selfish! At this point, the marriage has become more about “you” rather than about “us!” It’s my house, my car, my money, my furniture my name, my way or the highway, my… Somebody has a bad case of “Me”ness! No wonder you are in such a quandary.

You have now or will be joining the not happily ever after club soon! That is unless you decide to make your marriage a priority. So get busy doing something different; like making some improvements. Take a good look at what is going on or not going on. Reposition yourself and change the direction and get back on track. Sincerely work at reconciling your difference.

The first step for getting your marriage back on track is taking responsibility for your own actions. Stop behaving as though you are in the relationship by yourself. It is called being considerate. Your spouse is neither your servant nor parent! They are supposed to be your partner… Start treating your spouse the way you would like to be treated for starters. Life is precious. So humble yourself and let pride take a backseat. Take the wheel and take your marriage to a higher level.

Celebrate your marriage! Encourage one another and if necessary encourage yourself like King David. Don’t let anyone steal your JOY! If you have get busy getting it back!

See PART 3

There is Hope; Addiction Relief is Possible Part 1

 

 

 

Part 1

Addiction relief is possible. Few want to readily openly discuss addiction.  But since there has been such an overwhelming influx of problems worldwide related to addiction it warrants the spotlight.   But, there are reasons for alarm when an addiction is apparent. This  needs to be addressed. It will not just go away.  If not it will at some point impede upon your relationship.

 

Monkeys

 

Transparency is necessary in order to build intimacy. Your addiction will inhibit intimacy developing within your marriage. The addiction also prohibits you from being transparent. Love, transparency, trust and intimacy are essential components in building a healthy safe satisfying marriage.

 

Your Addiction says you are hurting

A clear indicator that you are hurting is addiction. You have simply found an unhealthy way to cope with your deep pain. Your addiction can be to alcohol, cocaine, heroin, marijuana.  Uppers, downers, prescription drugs, gambling, caffeine, pornography and or  illicit sex.  People food and even shopping. Yes and there are more… Even wanting approval from others can be addicting. Guess what? You have only found a way to momentarily relieve or somewhat ease your infuriating inner pain; it is still there. The addiction is a flag that something is wrong. You need to seek a healthy resolve.  Addiction relief is possible.

 

I say momentarily because while under the influence or indulging in the activity of choice you are able to somewhat escape. However the systemic cause remains because the pain returns whenever you are alone. Often more vehement than ever before. This causes you to pursue passionately that which you are addicted to. Having an addiction of any kind is serious. Many can be life threatening because you are out of control. Your desires consume you and disables your ability to be responsible or demonstrate  contol.  The ability to genuinely  love is questionable. Instead the activity controls you and you will do whatever it takes to get a “quick fix!”

 

The misuse  and dependency  upon opiates has become of great concern worlwide.  Not everyone becomes addicted from  illegal drugs.  Many have become addicted through the use of prescriptions medications. This should not be. This will greatly impact your spouse, children,  home, work  and career.

 

How does this impact my marriage?

Good question. Marriage is a partnership and when one has an addiction they are not able to fully commit because the addiction is often their main priority.  Well, the spouse that is unaware is often kept in the dark. Secrets, lies and deception accompany addiction. The addiction is used to fill the insatiable void in the addicted partner’s heart. It instead becomes their companion. This leaves their spouse out in the cold. Know, addiction relief is possible.

 

Your addiction creates undo tension. You need to learn to communicate openly and honeestly with your spouse.  Afterall you are supposed to be one.  Your addiction is robbinh you of building a beter relationship.

 

Causes or addiction triggers

A disordered family, peer pressure, cultural influences, abuse, incest, rape, molestation, lack of self-esteem and a weakness to experiment can all contribute to one developing an addiction.

 

We live in a drug friendly worldly environment. Daily we are bombarded with the invitation to take this pill or that pill. Notice how many television commercials attempt to sell you something to feel better.  Look how the dinner hour has become the prime time for what I call  commercial pushers. There are a multiplicity of pushers of all sort. Doctors also oblige patients with tranquilizers, stimulants, pain pills, sleeping pills even pills to wake you up!

 

Commitment in marriage is important

Keeping your commitments are important.  Embracing your vows is important.  Did you not commit to Him as well?  One thing that needs to be promoted more is a personal relationship with the Lord! Marriage is ordained by God. Did you know marriage was designed to be the ultimate sacred relationship between a man and a woman.  A strong marraige  can also help you prioritize life and put all your other relationships into their proper perspective.  Your marriage  can help you develop a healthier living environment as you work together

 

Building trust is an important part of marriage. Addiction relief is possible. 

 

As we commit to building healthier home environments we contribute to lessening the number of addictions continuing to escalate.   Not everyone has addiction issues.  In some  addictions have unconsciously been passed down through generations.   A safe home environment does not  always exclude addiction; but it does serve to nurture those who are there.   If this has been the case the possibility to break the generational cycle of dysfunction becomes attainable. You can change this! Yes, addiction relief is possible.

 

Develping a Healthy Support System

It is important to seek ways to validate one another. To develop an ongoing healthy support system that says I love and sincerely care. No this does not mean you support the addiction.   Neither do you allow it to become  the white elephant in the room no one notices.  However, you must confront the addiction.  You  can also find healthy ways to make them feel  uncomfortable. Also learn to separate the behavior from the person.  Encourage them to be the best they can be. Find ways to help them become who they were created to be without the addiction.

 

Working together

God created each of us uniquely and we have varying temperaments. Our needs are different when these needs are not met a void is created and therefore one seeks to often erroneously fill that void. Marriage is about working together to find healthier ways to fill some of those voids with a committed partner… There are some voids that can only be filled by God.

Your partner is not responsible for your addiction you are. Both must hold one another accountable for their actions! You both are accountable to God for the vows you made… Remember, “for better or for worse…”

In this 21st century emotional gasoline has flamed the fires of addiction. Pain, grief and stress not dealt with properly are great contributors that drive unhealthy desires. This does not have to be. God’s Holy Spirit His Comforter is more than able.

Addiction is big business therefore it is often rationalized and one can easily find access and support. Your addiction does not usually happen overnight it is a gradual process that begins with a series of steps…  So remember; theis help.  Addiction relief is possible!

Next we will discuss some of those steps;

Part 2

Holy Matrimony – Chapter 10 – Till Death Do Us Part

February 1, 2012 by  
Filed under Marriage & Relationships

Marriage is the first institution that God designed! Making a sincere commitment to your marriage is one of the most important decisions you can make in life. When God made Adam He made him both male and female. He took Eve out of Adam to be by his side. God is so wonderfully awesome! It was His intention to provide Adam with a compatible helpmeet to satisfy together their desires for companionship. Marriage is the ultimate partnership where two together can spiritually, physically and emotionally have there needs mutually met.

Marriage is a unique covenant agreement. Marriage is ordained by God. God intends for your marriage to last for a lifetime.

Purchase a copy of “Holy Matrimony: Now That We’re Married” to read more!!

HOLY MATRIMONY

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