Many seek ways outside the boundaries of the traditional marriage as we know it in order to fulfill their sexual desires! Many as well are in favor of redefining and changing what constitutes marriage. It is your choice but it is important to know that the only sex that God sanctions is within marriage between a man and a woman! Today we have a myriad of problems that are systemically rooted from improper sexual relationships! What do we do?
We continue to encourage healthier sexual boundaries! There is an exchange that takes places during sexual intercourse that goes much deeper than the physical! Coitus, the technical term for sexual intercourse, was meant to be a time of mutual pleasuring without being ashamed! You are making an emotional and physical deposit! You are giving and sharing the essence of you! At this time within the confines of marriage you become one and strengthen your union! It is at this time you can build physical intimacy! Take time to nurture one another during foreplay! You can share, build, strengthen and fortify one another as you both give from your heart! You reinforce your marriage vows!
Sex is so serious that it is a time that when a man and woman come together they can create a new life! WOW! Now that is really profoundly deep! The human body is amazing! There are healthy benefits available during sexual intimacy! Your stress and blood pressure reduces, it helps in decreasing the chances of prostate cancer, and it also increases the love hormone “oxytocin” which helps to bond and build trust! *“A long-term study of 3,500 people between 30 and 101 by clinical neuropsychologist David Weeks, MD, head of old age psychology at the Royal Edinburgh Hospital in Scotland, found that “sex helps you look between four and seven years younger…”
Don’t just go through the motions and allow sex to become mundane or just a physical exercise. Create a welcoming environment where both of you can experience warmth and satisfaction. Make it a goal to please one another by being cognizant of how one another is feeling! Remember, intercourse has a significant role in bonding! It is like epoxy! When the two sticky resin components come together they generate heat and the two polymers form a permanent bond! They fuse together as the fluids are released and come together! Sexual intercourse is a spiritual moment where the union “Holy Matrimony” is reinforced! You actually enter into the physical depth of your spouse! You give them the essence of who you are… This is also why it is important to not just have sex with just anyone!
If you have allowed your marriage to become commonplace and unexciting make some changes! Begin by enjoying one another daily, hold hands, welcome laughter, have fun by being affectionate, freely give hugs, affirmations and complement one another regularly and appropriately! Caring, gentle expressions of affection do not always mean you want to have intercourse! Recapture the tender moments that brought you together or create some! Don’t waste time, let it pass you by or live in regrets! Each day is a precious gift from the Lord!
If you are single please seriously think about waiting until…! You are valuable and deserve to be loved and respected by someone who is totally committed to you! Please make sure that you take the time to nurture yourself and deal with any unresolved issues! It is natural to desire and want a spouse! To want someone to grow with you! Compromising who you are is not necessary! Trust and emotional intimacy play a major role in a great marriage!
No need to fret over what has already happened! It is important to be mindful if you have been used or abused! Take some time to regenerate and emotionally restore and strengthen yourself! Set some guidelines and goals keeping in mind that you merit a good relationship! Take this time to grow closer to the Lord! Spend some time in His Word! After all He created you! Know that all His Word is true! He has promised to “supply all your needs…” Communication and transparency is a major component of a great marriage! It is important that you share common core values with your potential spouse! Be discerning and in the meantime guard your heart! It may take some time but it will be well worth waiting for your lover and spouse!
If you are already married ENJOY! Celebrate your marriage!
Solving conflict in marriage is not as difficult as it may seem. What makes it difficult is, if and when either or both spouses allow their ego to take the forefront! Then it becomes a battle between your wills; what I want and what you want! Don’t let this become the norm. Here is where the problems surface and can knit itself into the fabric of the marriage! It becomes the way you function! A contentious, fuss, fight, makeup, breakup unhealthy roller coaster! Humble yourself and don’t always wait for the other spouse to back down… Remember; “Practice makes permanent!”
Think about it for a minute! You decided to get married because you wanted a lifetime partner! You wanted a husband or wife that you could love, grow with, enjoy and be there for you! Of course you are going to disagree sometimes you are two different people!
You both have different temperaments! You process things differently! This is great and can make life interesting! When you disagree let this become a time of discovery! Allow one another the freedom of expression … You should want to know how each other are feeling! But show some respect! Hold fast and stand on godly principles rather than pride! When you both do this at some point you will reach understanding and meet on common ground! This also strengthens your marriage foundation! Work through those rough moments!
The Word teaches us that “iron sharpens iron…” Proverbs 18. Therefore you both working together can smooth out your rough edges! Don’t give up you can make it through this! But it is important for both spouses to keep in mind what is good for the marriage is good for you as a couple! Together you will build truthfulness, veracity, character, and integrity in one another as well as your marriage! Respect, commitment, loyalty, understanding, joy, support and perseverance are important ingredients in building a flourishing, resilient, strong marriage!